Our Baby Size Life!

Archive for the ‘Rant’ Category

Hey folks, it’s been a while, but I just got so busy with certain projects that were time sensitive that the blog took a hit.  Aunt Ingrid is a big reason for this, and I’ll be posting more on that for sure, but the other time bandit that’s been infecting our little lives is, well Season 4 of Bones on DVD. Good characters and good writing a TV show make! Can’t get enough, which is what makes it so dangerous to own on DVD: you watch ’till you drop! Oh well, things are looking to lighten up however, and I think we should be back on track!  Big news this week: Sam can fly!!!

Continue reading to see what I’m blabbering about…

While it is Fall and most kids of age have dreaded the return to school, Sam has taken an enthusiastic approach to what will soon become the norm for him.  Melissa’s mother recently gave us a kiddie sized desk and chairs for Sam to get his schoolness goin’ on. And judging from that last part of that last sentence, maybe I should go back too.  Up until recently, we had never really shown Sam the world of creative arts like finger painting, coloring, play-dough other mess inducing kiddie pastimes.  But the arrival of his own little station that he can sit down at and go crazy has opened the door to his mind… and our cleaning cupboard.

Continue reading here…

Over our summer vacation, we did a great many things that were all pretty sweet since they were all a first for Sam.  One of the highlights was going to a local area zoo!  I’ve never seen Sam whip out the pointing finger fast, and as often as he did that day.  Every thirty seconds, Sam’s mouth would gape and his hand would fly up dishing out the point towards some beast of nature.  It was, to say the least and exhausting day for the whole family.  The crowds weren’t too bad, as we had gone on a Wednesday, but all the same, common sense and polite manners were rarer than an albino rhino! <Rant starts here>It’s enough that their ignorant arses  and over-sized, triple-decker baby carriages take up all the room, but when they start nudging kids out of the way to get that perfect view… Well that just grinds my gears folks!<Rant ends here> Despite the unavoidables of the day, we had a great time and the day just flew, F-L-E-W I TELLS YA, by.  As you can see from the pic, Sam was out cold eight seconds after we strapped him into his car seat for the forty minute ride home. Once home, we unpacked him and brought him up to his bed without hearing a peep from him, and he slept for another 2 hours afterward

Continue reading to see what pooped out Sam!

Funny times these last two months, Sam’s 15th and 16th among us.  Now more than ever, he’s a little boy, growing into this world all the while showing us, as he grows, just who he is.  I realize he’s still figuring most of his habits, talents, likes and dislikes on the fly, but what a wild ride it is to behold.  Now he’s not a total basket case, he just has moments.    Especially when he’s tired, but I won’t blame him for that!  He’s actually pretty funny to watch as he runs over to his teddy bear to give it a big hug, then throw it on the ground and storm off crying because he can`t play with the blender anymore.  Or we can get him to giggle so much he drools, only to have him do the bacon dance eight seconds later if we walk away to answer the phone or something.

Heh, kids.

In case your wondering, the bacon dance is when Sam does these little convulsing fits all the while waving his hands and stomping his feet… It kind of reminds us of a bacon slice frying in a pan, bubbling and jumping… Yeah, well I’ll try to get some video of that, but I’m not sure Mom will let me

“John! Put down the freakin’ camera and give Sam his cookie back!!!”

Hehehe, yeah, that’s not going to happen folks! I do exaggerate a teeny, weensy bit when writing posts of course.  Sam’s is by no means troublesome as he actually quite smart and funny for his age.  We certainly can’t complain about a little, grumpy-gus face now and again, can we? Well, yes, I just did, but you get the idea.

Today, we went for a nice long bike ride with Sam jacked up in his bike seat on the rear of my bike. That stupid seat took me a full two hours longer to install than what the “super helpful and clear” instructions told me it would take, but I digress as that’s a rant for another time.  We risked the thirty minute ride under the threat of rain and went down to our local river to play on a little park-like inlet that sticks out into the river.  The road to this inlet, and half the inlet itself, is made from crushed stone… Like on most unpaved bike paths.  Sam has never walked on this type of stuff and of course, five steps into his rushed discovery of the area, he slips and falls.  Now I’d like to say he fell on his padded bum, but alas, it was more of a baseball-like, head-first dive into the gravelly dust.  Not only did Sam walk on the stuff for the first time, but he also tasted it too.

But that was the least of his problems.

As a head-first dive implies, his face first made contact with the ground and then proceeded to slide forward and undetermined distance.  Yeah, on his face. Poor kid. Mom picked the red faced, gavel encrusted Sammy up, dusted him off and picked what gravel she could out of his mouth.  He had scratched up the left side of his cheek and was bleeding. Crying some big tears, he reached for Mom and just wanted to be held… Heartbreaking stuff folks.  I swabbed the wound clean with some wet tissues and we decided to head back; because, on top of the fun we’d just had, rain clouds were headed our way. Perfect.

Luckily, we did get home nice and dry.  Mom cleaned Sam’s face up and he was fine the rest of the day, except for a big red blotch on his cheek.  My little Sam is now a cutie version of Harvey Dent, complete with the mood swings! This isn’t the last of his little bobos to be sure.  Sam’s a rambunctious little explorer in which bumps and scrapes are the norm of his daily job.  In addition to the cheek thing, yesterday Sam was climbing the stairs (with me following him, a lot of good that did!) and mistook the last step, smacking his upper lip on the wooden nosing of the 2nd floor. Ouch. A little bit of tears, a little bit of blood, a little Mom and Dad check up (all eight teeth present and accounted for!) and he was back out there conquering the house in no time!

Tough little kid. Nervous freakin’ parents!

Take care folks, and remember to watch your step!

Regardless of how you spend time in your life, every now and then something makes you stop and reflect.  It could be a song playing on the radio, a bit of news on the television or the sound of a familiar, yet long-forgotten voice.  It may be the smell of banana bread cooking in the oven, watching kids splash in a puddle of summer rain or just hearing the wind rustle the leaves of the trees in your backyard.  Anything can trigger a memory that makes you realize just how much time has past.  How much of your life you’ve lived.  Living my life in this hi-tech, fast paced time, I cherish these moments.  I sometimes even close my eyes and concentrate to keep them alive with me a little longer.  I can almost taste Mom’s piping hot, devilishly buttered banana bread on my tongue. But not all memories are brought to the surface of my jumbled, hurried thoughts by pleasant occurrences.

This past week, a particular wisp of remembrance stuck with me. The vividness of it astounds me and the amount of detail I can remember is far greater than most of my other lifelong recollections.  Memories tend to change a bit over time as certain facts are lost, but the purpose of the moment will live on even if you are not quite sure what that purpose is… You may not remember exactly what she was wearing, but you know she looked beautiful…

So,  here now I’d like to share a memory with you…

Continue Reading >>

More on this great Christmas gift later, but for now, enjoy!

The day-caring adventures continue! Ever since Sam started daycare over a month ago, I’ve always pictured something like this happening and wondered how I would react.  Well, now I can tell you: I’m gonna kick that kids ASS! I’m gonna LOSE IT! I’m gonna SNAP!

Yep, I’m taking the law into my own hands, just until I can teach Sam to give out some knuckle sandwiches.  His little baby slaps are clearly ineffective against this larger, more experienced foe.  I mean COME ON! How old is this kid?!? 17? 18… months old!?! That’s almost twice the quarter of Sam’s age!  So I’m stepping in on my sons behalf to make it a fairer fight. 

What did the kid do to Sam? Check it out!

See that scratch there? Around the eye? That kid meant business… that kid wanted to send a message to the ‘new kid in the pen’.  Well in the immortal words of Bugs Bunny: “Of course you know.” *smack* *smack* *smack* “This means war!”

On the serious side, Sam’s doing alright.  Nothing serious.  He was playing with his widdle friends, and has things often do when kiddies get together: it turned into a bloody slaughter.  Our reaction was, at first, making sure Sammy-boy was OK, then we found the kid who did this to him and kicked him in the pampers! Right between the two little mickey mouse characters printed on the front of it!

Kidding… No really. Put down the phone… I’d be gone before the cops got here anyways MUAHAHA!

But accidents do happen, and Melissa and I were pretty cool about it, because we know that one day, Sam will be the guy doin’ the cutting. As bad as that sounds (or reads), it is bound to happen. Kids are kids and while we will do our best, we can’t watch them all the time! But just in case, maybe I’ll stop watching those slasher marathons with Sam…

You know… just in case…

Today is his BIG day folks!  Sam’ was born exactly one year ago today at 12:34 pm, a lunch time baby! I remember every detail like it was yesterday.  All the excitement and nervousness and general feeling that our lives were about to change forever was coming to fruition on this exact day, during these exact moments, only one year ago.

From my perspective on Sam’s birth, I recall that feeling of anticipated yet welcome anxiety comparable to being on a roller coaster, but not just any roller coaster… THE roller coaster.  The one everyone has been talking about.  The most dangerous, death defying ride in the world, and after all the hype and rave reviews, when the excitement level is at it’s peak and people are clamoring and fighting to get in line… You’re there , sitting in the front car, being slowly pulled up that first big climb.  Pulled into the unavoidable plunge that awaits beyond.  You know what’s coming.

You know it’s going to be scary, but you know it’s going to be fun.

So, you just accept it and grip that harness a little tighter as you crest the peak and see the horizon reach out far below you, and then… nothing.  Everything slows down, maybe even stops: you’re stuck in a place between moments.  On the brink of the upcoming chaos, everything seems so clear, your future,  your past, and then, just when you come to that realization… EVERYTHING COMES RUSHING BACK AND YOUR FLYING DOWN THAT SLOPE! Thrilling and frightening rolled into one, your pulled along without any ability to control what’s happening.  You put your head down against the crushing speed as it presses you down into your seat, your stomach lifts into your throat. You feel as if you can no longer hold on, that you will simply fly off the tracks, only to finally lift your head and see…

Little hands and little feet.

A hairy little head peeking from between the fold of his mothers caressing arms.

Then his first cries flood into your numbed ears and you hear him.

Even though you just met, you know you’ll do anything to keep him safe, fed, warm, and loved. Anything. It’s a feeling of such selflessness that runs head first into any other feeling you may have had.  The cars, the movies, the gadgets, things that formerly seemed important and necessary, are suddenly cast aside.  There is a greater purpose to living than buying a great house or working to get the next promotion. You now have someone who completely depends on you, who needs you to be there. It’s an incredible responsibility to be sure, but you are more than up to it.  I was living before, but it seemed like life started over again for me at that moment, a second birth if you will.  The birth of a Father.

If you don’t have kids, this may sound over the top, or even drastic.  But I can only relay how I felt and how Sam’s birth affected me.  Other parents may not feel the same as well, and that’s OK.  It’s an intensely personal experience that I felt the need to share, if not to record, lest that feeling wane in the many years ahead… which I hope will never happen.

All I can say is that this is probably the best way I communicate my emotions on that day, as a new father, one year ago… and I wasn’t even giving birth!  Melissa, I’m sure, felt all this an more as she was actually bringing a life into this world.  Something I’ll never experience.  But having felt, and lived through that moment, being, well let’s be honest, a spectator to the miracle that was unfolding, I can honestly say that maybe that’s a good thing.  I don’t think I could have handled it otherwise!  Melissa is an unbelievable person that I am blessed to have in my life… and now she’s given me a second being to love just as much.

She’s the best, bar none, and I’ll  love her forever for it.  Even though it’s Sam’s birthday, she’s given me the gift.  From now on, on every February 20th, I’ll relive what is the best day of my life over and over…

How do you top that?

While you may not remember this day Sam, your parents will, forever.

Happy Birthday Samuel,

Love Mom & Dad

This past weekend, we, ahem, well Sam was invited to his friend Maxime’s 1st birthday party! But since Sam’s legs are too short to hit the gas pedal, we drove him there and got invited in too. Which is good, cause I would’ve hated waiting, and freezing in the car for a few hours while Sammy-boy parties it up with the lady-babies inside.  Last time that happened, the cops showed up, someone flushed some powder and everything got out of hand!  So, it was nice to get inside and see our Sam in action around other babies.  It’s an interesting thing to see, because we are with Sam most of the time, and he’s alone, so he plays and acts accordingly.  Then, at these parties, you plop your little pamper packer in with a couple other chubby offsprings, and you can see things you wouldn’t have thought a possibility only a couple hours ago.

Case in point: sharing. Yeah, that’s a tough one for two kiddies to master, but Maxime just turned one, and Sam will be this week.  I’m thinking it’s a little early to start pushing the concept of sharing on them, but after what I saw at that party, it might be a good thing to “slide” it in there on a daily basis.  Now it’s not like Sam tore every toy away from Maxime and tried to use his head as a step-ladder… He did that last time they played It’s funny, and a little odd, to see your “sweet” kid smack the toys out of his playmate and proceed to push him over to get to the top of the toy pile.  This time around, Sam was more into the “I want your toy” mentality, grabbing whatever Maxime had to keep as his own… for three seconds before discarding it.

Immediately, I kind of chuckled at his boldness: me boy’s got a pair eh!?! But then I realized that I, being a parent of said emboldened child, must now act on this situation and set it right.  This is when the parents learn as well.  Because we are no longer the bystanders, looking down on two kids aggressively dominating the toy population, laughing and commenting on how funny and cute they are in their little battles.  We are now responsible for Sam’s behavior in social situations as well, not just in the privacy of our homes. Sheeesh! Parenting indeed! Get off your ass Dad and tell Sam to share and be nice!

Overall, the party was great fun and Sam was a good boy, despite my exaggerated view of his playpen encounters.  Maxime had his birthday cake all to himself, and he was hesitant at first to get messy and dig in; but eventually, once he tasted the icing and cake, he smeared himself good.  We all had a good laugh watching him to that, the other mothers in the room reminiscing about their own kids doing them same.  Next up, he unwrapped his gifts while I held Sam in my arms.  Sam wasn’t interested in the presents, he was now effectively six feet higher up than usual… Which brought him closer to the balloons hanging from the ceiling!  Sam’s a big fan of balloons.  He swats and smacks and twhacks them all while giggling along.  I wonder if he’ll still love them if he pops one?

We left shortly after, and Sam was sleeping in his car seat thirty seconds into the ride home. Played hard he had, poop he know was.  This Saturday, it will be Sam’s turn as he will turn 1 on February 20th! We can wait, it’ll be  a fun party with Sam hopefully getting very messy with his cake… which will be in the same theme as the party.  I won’t tell you what that theme is now, but suffice to say, it’s a theme he loves.  Speaking of his party, I’d better get going on some of the planning!  Thanks for reading, have a good week everybody!

Well, whomever said that parenting was an ever learning state of being hit the freakin’ nail on the head. Another little nugget of information concerning babies and their digestive systems has just acquired some real estate in my ever expanding parental brain. Here’s the situation: Sam has developed a little cough over the past couple days, and last night it got a little… well… wetter. You know what I mean, he’s got some snotty action going on in there now.

So, Melissa and I figure a cold has set in and we proceed to clean out his nose before giving him his pre-bedtime bottle, which is one of the favorite moments of my day. Sam and I settle into the comfy rocking chair in his room, I dim the lights, throw on a little sleepy-time music and plug the kid into his dairy fix. Bliss folks… pure bliss. That went well, the problem came afterward. Just as Sam was finishing his bottle and I was easing him off to La-La Land, Melissa sticks her head in the door way and reminds me to give him some Tempra infant cold medicine before he falls asleep. Ah Mommy to the rescue! Insensitive and uncaring Dad would’ve put little Sammy to bed all stuffed up and snorting boogers all night. Well, no, of course I would not have done that, but Mommy was right as it would help him sleep.

So up we get, away from the warm and friendly confines of the rocking chair to Sam’s crib where I lay him down. Sam immediately sits up, then stands up gripping the edge of the crib. Great! He’s more awake now and he’s vertical which should make giving him the medicine a little easier. Turns out, it just gave him greater range. Let me explain…

So I kneel in front of him and wrap one arm around his body as the other hand feeds him the meds. I had barely twisted the cap on the medicine bottle when some very warm fluid soaked my shirt. Puke! Not wanting to drop Sam, I call for Melissa to come and give me a hand, which turned out to be a good call, because Sammy-boy wasn’t done. The second and bigger projectile-like wave hit the crib railing, my left arm, his mattress, the crib bars and finally dripped down on his carpet. Super fun vomit party! Sam’s head didn’t spin, so we didn’t all a young priest and an old priest…

Sparing you some of the details (like pea and carrot chunks), everything was covered in a nice pinkish liquid, due to the fact that the milk and Tempra, a red colored cold medicine, had mixed… And the smell…whoo baby! I think I prefer the foul odor of a full diaper sitting in the hot sun. Melissa took Sam and cleaned him up as I worked on the room. After we got done, Sam fell asleep right away. Poor little guy was up way past his bedtime! Despite his rosé reflux, he slept great!

Dad, on the other hand, felt a little guilty about making his son behave like a super model on a diet, but now I know the rule not to mix red and white applies to kids too!

…and knowing is half the battle!